We are at the 4 year anniversary of buying our house; we are at the one year anniversary of finding out that our cottage resident would be moving to Utah.
I do not feel buyer's remorse, but every year, as insurance bills start arriving in the mail, I do wonder how long we can afford to live here. This morning, I wondered if God ever has buyer's remorse. I thought about our planet as a house in need of constant repair. I wrote a poem.
I envision God as having irritation at being able to see the potential in a place, but not being able to quite pull off the transformations that should be possible. I look at my temporary kitchen and think about ways that the permanent kitchen might be better. We have the money set aside. All I need is the time to get some estimates--and to move into the cottage for the reconstruction period. And before that can happen, we'll need to get the space ready . . . and the floors fixed . . . . And then the largeness of the task overwhelms me. I imagine God feeling the same way.
If I carry this metaphor onward, does that mean that humans are God's contractors? I could make that work. Some contractors know what they are doing. Others will take the money and vanish.
But as I am committed to my house, so is God committed to this resurrection project. My poem ends at the end of the day with God having a glass of wine on the front porch as the sun sets.
It's still Eastertide, after all.
feeling the feelings…
2 months ago