Catching Up with Campus Pastors

A week ago, we'd have been at Hilton Head Island with my parents and my sister.  We knew that family friends were vacationing in nearby Charleston.  They were willing to come to us for dinner, and we were willing to cook.  What a treat of an evening.

I am startled to realize how long I've known these family friends.  When I was a teenager in Charlottesville, Virginia, he was the UVa campus pastor with an office at St. Mark's Lutheran Church, and she was the choir director. My mom was instrumental in bringing them together; she had conversations with each of them, when each one expressed their interest in the other.  She asked each one if she could let the other know, and they said yes--that would be the best kind of matchmaker to be.  They've been together ever since. 

Later, he came to be campus pastor at the University of South Carolina, where I was a graduate student.  Every Wednesday, I headed over to the student center for dinner, worship/programming and fellowship.  Occasionally, we'd go to Sunday worship.  Those were great years.

Forty years ago, I was the crucifer in the wedding of these family friends, and when my spouse and I got married in 1988, we asked him to officiate, and he said yes.  In later years, we've all lived in a variety of places, but we've kept up with each other.  It was great to see them again last Tuesday night and catch up face to face.

I enjoyed hearing what everyone had been up to, and as a person who is headed to seminary, I was glad to hear about the trajectory of their lives, to remember that there are many ways to serve the church:  campus pastor, parish pastor, staff member/director of a regional group that supports campus ministry--and that's just in one life.

I also found his creative path interesting.  He's one of the few people I know who got a PhD in Literature and Theology, an intersection which he explored both as a scholar and a creative writer.  But in the last 20 years, he's been exploring visual arts, primarily photography and painting.  And here I am, exploring similar paths.  He talked about an opportunity that he had to paint and to retreat and to study in Assisi.  What a dream opportunity that would be.

There were moments throughout the last week away when I had that wrenching realization of how many decades I've already been on this planet, and how the same is true of everyone I love.  I am lucky in that I expect to have a few more functional decades.  I'm trying not to give in to anticipatory grief as I realize how old my parents and friends are getting, which is also anticipatory grief for me. 

There's also the realization of how many people I've lost track of:  other campus pastors who were important to me, for example.  At the University of South Carolina, the Lutherans were joined with Episcopalians and Methodists in one center, and the Methodist pastor was very important to me.  Her five year assignment ended, and she went on to her next call.

But let me be happy that she was there.  Let me be grateful for all the important people in my life to whom I am still connected.  Let me be happy that there are all sorts of trajectories that so many of us are still exploring.