I've had a long car trip and several conversations with old friends, so let me process the experience I've just had in the certificate program for spiritual direction. I'm back from the first onground intensive and can't wait until the second one in June.
I don't know that I learned much that I hadn't already been exposed to before. But as with many subjects, it's always good to be reminded. And the subject matter was stuff I love, so I didn't mind when I was hearing familiar material. And there were always new nuggets.
Each intensive will have a different instructional focus, and this time's focus kept circling back to mysticism, the through a Christian lens mysticism. So we had a session on Thomas Merton and one on icons and one on Celtic Christianity. We had worship services that incorporated Celtic elements, including a beautiful, candlelit Compline with elements straight from Iona. Ahhhh.
I enjoyed the chance to get to know lots of new people, most of whom were very interesting. I had some great conversations with pastors and counselors.
I didn't expect to get insight on my seminary discernment process, but I did. I've been thinking about online options and part-time options. It's becoming clearer to me that I can't really do a part-time seminary process. It was hard enough getting away for these few days, and I was troubleshooting issues and assisting from a distance. The online options I've seen have a 2 week intensive twice a year. It's just not very realistic to hope I can get away for 2 weeks and not fair to those who will have to pick up the work in my absence.
I'm also realizing that my yearning for seminary may be a yearning for a kind of community that I don't have right now. An online option won't give me that in the way that I want--at least, that's my thinking right now.
I'm very glad to be doing this certificate program. In some ways, it makes me wonder about what I just wrote in the previous paragraph. I do feel like we're forming a community, one that I'll feel sad about losing as people cycle in and out of the program. It reminds me a bit of retreat communities.
I'm also a bit worried that the community that I assume would happen in seminary might not be there. I was told that Southern has 70 students, 6 of whom are out on internship, but I didn't see many students. A few days offered beautiful weather, but I didn't see people out and about. There certainly weren't 70 students at the opening worship. I only saw 3 students in the library. Very puzzling.
Well, here we are, on a Monday when the rest of the nation may be observing an MLK day. I don't have this day off, although many of our students do. So I will go to pick up the day old bread and treats from Publix, go to spin class, and then go to work. During my lunch hour, I'll help my spouse with returning the rental car and getting our replacement for the car that got totaled in the pre-Christmas flood.
Yes, it's time to return to regular life--may it be a gentle re-entry. May I remember this piece of teaching about how to deal with people who may be feeling distress: "Be the mirror, not the sponge."
thinking too hard
4 years ago
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